Recently, I've been thinking about all the "first impressions" we get when we meet people. A lot of our impressions come even before we've actually met the person in front of us.
If someone looked at me, they would see a few outward markings that may give them some wrong impressions. Since most everything I do comes with a lot of thought and intention (even being spontaneous is intentional for me, lol), I thought I'd take a moment to explain a few things you may have been wondering about my outward appearance.
First of all, I have a nose piercing. Many people have a hard time reconciling nose ring with pastor, but here is where you'll see it proudly on display. My nose ring is a badge of honor. It represents the battle I overcame of fear and complacency. I had reached a certain age and stage in my life where I was handling everything fairly easily. I had actually become board with my life, but fear of the unknown kept me from venturing out very far. I was not a risk taker. I liked adventure, but only ones I chose myself. One day, my daughter said she was getting her nose pierced and asked me if I wanted to do the same. "No Way!" I had no desire to cause myself intentional pain like that. I watched her go through the process and went to bed that night having to confront all the fears that were suddenly exposed through the events of the day. I was afraid of everything! I was afraid of getting stuck, afraid of moving forward. I was afraid for my daughter as she moved in adventure and afraid for my other two kids who did not. I was afraid of everything I knew was coming and of all the unknown events ahead. After hours of categorizing all my fears, I realized that I wanted to be rid of them once and for all. I broke the partnership I had nurtured with fear in the wee morning light. The next day got my nose pierced.
I have two tattoos. The first one will forever be a strangely fond memory and learning curve in my life. In 1999, my then new daughter-in-law took me for a walk in Destine, FL, where my son was stationed in the Air Force. She brought me into a tattoo parlor and showed me all the pictures she would like to have inked into her body. She asked me if I would ever get a tattoo. I religiously replied, "My husband would never allow it." Deep inside, I thought it might be fun, but really had never given it much thought. When we arrived home, she asked my husband if I could get a tattoo. Much to my surprise (and a bit of horror), he said, "She can do whatever she wants." That moment marked something huge in our marital partnership. My husband saw me as he saw himself and trusted me to make my own decisions. I decided to bond with my daughter-in-law and accept her challenge. I got a small rose on my ankle (one of the most painful places to get a tattoo, by the way). Our kids eventually divorced, but she will always be someone I chat with God about, even now, because I have that memory on my body.
My 2nd tattoo looks a little strange when you first notice it. It's on my forearm and people have often thought it was of an alien. It's actually a ladybug in a hero costume. I had a daughter who inspired me more than anyone ever has. She lived 30 years with a disease that was scheduled to take her out before she ever reached her teens. She taught me what trust looked like and mentored me to be able to minister everywhere without ever using any words. She was my hero, but we called her "Ladybug". When she passed away, I drew her caricature and put it in a place where I would always remember the things she instilled in me.
There are lots of other things people probably notice about me before they ever get to know the person I am inside. These are the kinds of things that draw me to others too. I want to know the stories behind the things they wear on their sleeves. It may not be as noticeable as tattoos or piercings. It may be simply their hair styles, their clothing or their figures. I want to find out their stories, their battles, their victories. I want to be inspired and learn from all they've experienced. I want to connect and feel like this world isn't just a giant busy place. I want to know and be known. Don't we all?
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